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Tales Of The Unexpected Series 7
01/07/2008 . Source: Geoff Willmetts 
region 2: pub: Network B0015B04KE 500 minutes 3 DVDs. Price: £24.99 (UK). Buy Tales Of The Unexpected Series 7 in the USA - or Buy Tales Of The Unexpected Series 7 in the UK  check out website: www.networkdvd.co.uk
Where to start with this seventh season and anthology from the late 70s of the 'Tales Of The Unexpected'. Twenty stories and only one I consider a dud, mostly cos of the way it was drawn out. The main reason I've included mini-synopsises with all of them is because so many were made in America this time and our friends across the pond might find it easier to identify their favourite actors. I should also point out that the length of the synopsis is based on the story complexity rather than any favouritism.
'The Dirty Detail' starring Kevin Dobson (later in 'Kojak') and George Peppard (prior to 'The A-Team'). Troubled ex-soldier (Dobson) with a medical background and a reputation for being messy in the Marines finally recognises his old sergeant (Peppard) in a bar. Tells him he owes his $100 but a contrivance to shoot him but the old sergeant refuses to give in.
'The Best Chess Player In The World' starring Michael Jayston. Chess player and utterly ruthless newspaper owner GB Shaw (Jayston) sees things only as in value for money. Discovering his wife has a lover, he arranges to kill her only to be out-manoeuvred himself.
'Proxy' starring Patrick O'Neal and Tom Smothers. A millionaire's blackmailer is found dead by his chauffeur. He brings two others in who've been blackmailing her about it. The chauffeur proposes to take the blame providing the three pay him off.
'Have A Nice Death' starring Simon Cadell. TV celebrity woman-hater gets phone messages threatening his death. After some mild attempts and threats over the phone at his life, he wants to flee from the USA but is persuaded to stay. His nice death comes from the last person he suspected.
'Number Eight' starring Dennis Christopher and Brad Dourif (yeah! That's what I thought and boy, is he young here). Hitchhiker irritates his lift. The radio news reveals there's a multiple killer, nicknamed Will O' The Wisp, is on the loose. They stop at a garage for petrol and the hitchhiker intimidates everyone, including a couple women in the café. The shock comes later. Absolutely brilliant.
'The Last Of The Midnight Gardeners' starring Jane Asher, Celia Gregory, Jim Norton and Patrick Mower. Publisher (Mower) regretting a story competition he started has to invite her secretary, whom he is having an affair, to his wife's dinner party when she needs a fourth when the doctor's wife can't come. 'Midnight Gardeners' is the term the publisher uses for murderers who snapped. The publisher is persuaded to drop out of being one of the judges and writing a story himself. The publisher collapses dead after completing his story. There is no obvious cause for the death although the secretary works out that the wife had traded manuscripts cos her husband had shown the method, using a medical drug. Very ingenious.
'The Gift Of Beauty' starring Carol Lynley. Widowed woman decides to go through various therapies to make her younger to please her toyboy after he killed her husband. Then she runs foul of her dead husband's mistress. A nice twist.
'Wet Saturday' starred Friz Weaver and Ed Begley Jr. Father and son are trying to find an alternative solution when they discover his daughter's boy-friend dead and she's probably responsible. They fake evidence on a visiting neighbour just in case the body is discovered. Later, the father arranges for the police to call. If anything, this story is rather slow going compared to the rest.
'Sauce For The Goose' starring Gloria Grahame and Robert Morse. Woman and her lover arrange an 'accident' for her husband. He already has a lover and misses an appointment. Suspicious, she investigates and finds them together but he talks her around. They marry and do a world tour even if he has a roving eye. Returning home, she almost has a similar 'accident' as her late husband. Various further attempts to 'accidentally' kill her starts her doing the same to him. Finally, she spots her new husband romancing an old flame. Her planned fate for him backfires but ultimately gets him. A truly funny twist.
'Bird Of Prey' starring Sondra Locke, Frank Converse and Charles Hallahan. Petroleum outpost home broken into by a large bird. Husband gets irritated by alternate shift worker dropping in on his wife every afternoon before he comes off-shift. Their pet parrot lays an egg far bigger than it could do before dying. They incubate the egg which the alternate worker is away only to come back to a giant black parrot. The wife is pregnant and when the husband goes and gets champagne, the parrot tells him otherwise with dire consequences.
'I Like It Here In Wilmington' starring Tom Smothers, Susan Strasburg and Robert Loggia. Angry fashion designer has dresses that are too short and can't sell them. Confides with his wife the only way out is to kill his business partner in the act of adultery after a publicised affair to get away with it. Mind you, his wife isn't in on the final plan.
'Accidental Death' starring Cyril Cusack, Andrew Ray and Lynsey Baxter. Couple doing a survey for metal polish are actually sizing up places to rob at a seaside resort. They don't find any good easy opportunities until they meet a man at the hotel bar and discover later he's a rich man who plays poor. The woman visits his house and while he bargains for her broken bracelet she looks around. They return while he's at the pub to burgle his place. The man gets barred from the pub for annoying other drinkers, arrives early and shoots the husband but dies in the kickback. The wife gets her husband to hospital but with a rare blood group the only person close enough is the man they were burglarising. Look out for actress Jacqueline Hill (aka Barbara from the earliest 'Dr Who' series).
'The Reconciliation' starring Roger Rees, John Castle, Meg Davies and Jim Norton. Unhappy husband told to go on an Italian holiday alone rather than get a divorce. He arrives home and rents a separate flat and tells his lawyer he wants a divorce. They only way they can do it quickly is the wife is found to be committing adultery. There is a reluctant take on employing an private investigator to find out and he does. The husband is still reluctant and disbelieving but evidence is drawn and wants her back because she's become intriguing. He returns and she says she's been in Aberdeen, learning over the phone that it's been a friend the detective had been watching. This story is done purely from the husband's perspective and we don't see any of the surveillance.
'The Open Window' starring Dina Merrill, Valerie Mahaffey and Richard Dow. A daughter entertains a man at her mother's holiday house where a ritual is waiting to happen. She tells him of her step-father and how he accidentally shot and killed his son, her step-brother, when out hunting then immediately kills himself. She thinks her mother is waiting for them to come back to their holiday home. The mother is a bit loopy about them returning and the man offers to take the daughter away. He's not quite sane himself. It's too late to leave and dinner is served. Even more remarkable the step-father and step-brother return and he flees. A rather confusing tale.
'People Don't Do Such Things' starring Arthur Hill, Don Johnson and Samantha Eggar and based on a Ruth Rendell story. Writer sees an accountant about his annual audit. The accountant's wife is a big fan of the writer and all three become friends. At a dinner party, the writer breaks up with his girl on the pretext he's going to Mexico which upsets the accountant's wife who never wants to see him again. The writer gives the accountant a copy of his new book for his wife as a peace offering. Much later, he tells the accountant that he's off to the Riviera which upsets the wife when she hears this. After she runs out, the accountant discovers some of the writer's jewellery in the bedroom and puts things together. He meets her, telling his wife that the writer just locks himself away from the world who runs off. Later, his wife's strangled body is found with some of the writer's jewellery on her incriminating the writer. This is the longest of the synopsis here. Sorry about that. It's also a great story.
'The Mugger' starring Roy Marsden, Kate Harper and Amanda Boxer. Newly appointed cabinet politician with a wife who's not happy with his new job, especially the crank letters. Walking to a dinner appointment across the park, the politician is stalked. At the party, he meets a woman also recently got a job as a publicist who makes a pass at him. She gives him a lift home but stops in the park, makes more than a pass and gets rebuked by the politician. He finishes his walk across the park only to have his pocket dipped. Chasing after the thief back into the park, he gets his wallet back after thumping the man. Near his home, he alerts a police constable to the mugging. At home, his wife shows him his own wallet, found under his son's pillow. by his wife. A police detective interrogates the politician and finds he's the one accused of the mugging, taking the wallet from his alleged mugger.
'In The Cards' starring Susan Strasburg and Max Gail (later of 'Barney Miller'). Fortune-teller does a deal with a new man in town, a little low on cash but a knack for repairing things, that she will tell his fortune if he will repair her toaster. She reads his cards and predicts he will come into wealth providing he gets married and manipulates him into marrying her, especially as she hasn't told him he will die shortly afterwards. Six months later, the prediction still hasn't happened and she finds the man a slob. An attorney visits and its the fortune-teller who is going to inherit $350,000. She tells her husband that's she's going to leave him and he demands half the money. He goes out to dig a fishpond and she checks the cards which still gives the same prediction. He finds a tin in the hole full of money but proposes they bury it as a nest-egg to avoid taxes. It isn't and the prediction comes true. Another intricate plot demonstrating how much can be squeezed into a twenty-five minute story.
'Nothin' Short Of Highway Robbery' starring Warren Oats, Bud Cort and Jennifer Holmes. A couple pull up at a desert petrol station and the attendant says he doesn't have any unleaded petrol much to the wife's disbelief. The attendant points out a fault in the car and advises not to travel too fast. The disbelieving wife who clearly doesn't like over-spending while her husband thinks it prudent to get it sorted while they dine at the nearby café. When they return, the car is repaired and other defects are pointed out. They decline, unsure if the attendant is having them on. The car breaks down half a mile from the station and they drive slowly back. The couple take humble pie for all the repairs to be done. When they get ready to pay, they take out their guns. An appointment they were late for was to rob a bank.
'Scimshaw' starring Joan Hackett and Charles Kimbrough. Woman on the down-and-out meets an old friend who takes her in. He works on scrimshaw - decorated whale ivory - and tells her the island collects lost souls. He's also after fresh bones to work on. This has to be the slowest story of the bunch although the hint of menace at the end should give some pause for thought. Compared to the intricacies of the earlier stories this one comes over practically as an art film.
'Skeletons In The Cupboard' starring Charles Dance, Francesca Brill and Zoe Wannamaker. High-flying exec, about to change his job, is passed a letter sent to a defunct car club he used to belong to. He covertly meets the girl who is looking for someone from the club member without giving his identity away. Back home, he checks an old newspaper about a hit-and-run that he did many years ago. When she gets too close, he strangles her and destroys the evidence. The twist at the end is the girl had nothing to do with him but the daughter of his wife, fostered out long before she got married. A lasting impact for the end ot the seventh series.
This latest season blends a lot more humour with the unexpected twist which really makes this DVD collection a pleasure to watch but spread them out to one a day to really appreciate the story and acting quality.
Looking through these episodes, actors like Susan Strasburg, Jim Norton and Andrew Ray have cropped up again, doing entirely different roles. The skill of a good actor is seeing them only in their current parts.
With only two more seasons to go now, it you haven't hooked into this series, its worth considering as it's a great teaching ground in how to convey complex stories with novel twists. It's also a sharp reminder that we need to resurrect the half hour thriller today as well.
GF Willmetts
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